The Loneliness Initiative

THE LONELINESS INITIATIVE

Creating interaction and human connection opportunities for those experiencing loneliness and social isolation.

We graduate from college and take a job in a new city; a romantic relationship ends; friends move or enter a different phase of life – there are multiple ways we can find ourselves socially isolated. The Loneliness Initiative was created not because loneliness happens, that is part of the human condition, but because of the difficulty of extricating oneself. In years past, community institutions, Churches, clubs and groups of many forms provided opportunities to socialize, but are now far less active or closed completely. As a society we are less trusting of strangers, spend less time with neighbors and have fewer friends. These societal changes, the causes of which are broad and complex, create a daunting situation for those who are lonely, leading in far too many cases to a spiral into depression and hopelessness. The Loneliness Initiative was founded to create opportunities for conversation, to create spaces that encourage and nurture connection, and to help those suffering from isolation find a way to a healthier social setting.

Impact of Loneliness

Loneliness is not just a mental health issue, there are very real physical health effects. According to the Surgeon General’s report, chronic loneliness has the equivalent impact of smoking 15 cigarettes a day and reduces life expectancy by 10 years.

“Loneliness is far more than just a bad feeling—it harms both individual and societal health. It is associated with a greater risk of cardiovascular disease, dementia, stroke, depression, anxiety, and premature death. The mortality impact of being socially disconnected is similar to that caused by smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day, and even greater than that associated with obesity and physical inactivity. And the harmful consequences of a society that lacks social connection can be felt in our schools, workplaces, and civic organizations, where performance, productivity, and engagement are diminished.”

0%
of people who were never visited by friends or family are more likely to die from cardiovascular disease.
0%
of people who were never visited by friends or family are more likely to die from cardiovascular disease.

Bawden, A. (2023, November 10). People never visited by loved ones more likely to die earlier, study finds. The Guardian. https://www.theguardian.com/society/2023/nov/10/people-never-visited-by-loved-ones-more-likely-to-die-earlier-study-finds

Our Initiatives

Conversation Benches

Leveraging an idea first applied in England and by working with Parks Departments and local governments, a park bench or group of benches is established as a Conversation Bench. We provide a sign encouraging people to sit and converse with others. These benches become gathering areas – lively centers of connection.

Coffee Shop Table Markers

Coffee shops are ideal gathering spots and opportunities for conversation and connection. We provide a specially printed Table Tent with our logo, the description “Place this marker on your table if you are open to conversation with others.” and a QR code to this website. Patrons can place the marker on their table, leading to conversation and connection with other patrons.

Restaurant Group Seating

Restaurants provide another ideal gathering place. Taking an idea from European restaurants which often seat parties together at larger tables and thereby create opportunities for conversation, this initiative encourages restaurants to adopt a European style group table seating model. We work with restaurants to cover a portion of the cost of new tables and chairs.

Gathering Spaces

Our newest initiative takes advantage of the social nature of men, who best help each other while focusing on a common goal or project. We provide complete designs and instructions to build gathering spaces for parks and town squares – Gazebos, Pavilions and Performing Arts stages. Local groups, supported by Makers Spaces and Workshops, build the structure and in turn create many opportunities for conversation and connection.

How Can I Help?

Start Now

“Each of us can start now, in our own lives, by strengthening our connections and relationships. Our individual relationships are an untapped resource—a source of healing hiding in plain sight. They can help us live healthier, more productive, and more fulfilled lives. Answer that phone call from a friend. Make time to share a meal. Listen without the distraction of your phone. Perform an act of service. Express yourself authentically. The keys to human connection are simple, but extraordinarily powerful.”

Be Present

We can make an impact by being present and involved in our communities, remembering that our communities are made of individuals. Invite a new friend to dinner, involve an acquaintance in a gathering or activity, honestly and openly seek common interests and connection in others. So many of us live in a bubble, safe with our family, friends and activities, never reaching out to those on the outside. And yet this behavior lies at the heart of the epidemic – as a society we no longer look for connection with others. By recognizing the societal shifts, and its impact on those suffering from isolation, we can change our behaviors and create opportunities for connection. Small, simple actions that can have a powerful effect.

Have a Conversation

If talking to strangers doesn’t come to you naturally, you can teach yourself how to start a conversation with anyone.

Learn How

If I’m Lonely?

The feeling of loneliness itself, and the energy required to constantly reach out to others, desperately trying to establish a friendship or connection, while getting nothing in return – its debilitating. The result is often depression and a deepening sense of isolation and hopelessness. Yet effort is your power. Effort. Stay positive, remind yourself of your own self worth. Be proud of simply showing up and trying. Take care of yourself and surroundings. Keep your home clean, cook a good meal, exercise. By taking care of yourself, you are reminded of your own self worth and dignity – providing the energy to show up again tomorrow. Not all people are destined to be friends. Many are living parallel, but separate, lives. Others are content in their family or circle of friends, and are not aware of their ability to help. But keep showing up anyway. Steadily your efforts will pay off. You will find connection and a sense of belonging.

Focusing on an interest, a hobby, and finding groups that participate in those interests can be an ideal path to establishing friendships. This is also an ideal time to try something new. Visit a Maker’s Space or a gym. Search Meet-Up for groups in your area. Use the opportunity to broaden your world.

Who else is working in this space?

CaringBridge is a nonprofit organization designed to help rally support for a loved one during a medical journey, often to plan for hands-on assistance before and after surgery. A family member or friend going through medical procedures can create a webpage that is used to coordinate the support of family and friends across a wide network—an excellent way to organize and plan care with a circle of supportive people.

Visit caringbridge.org to learn more.

Developed for people over fifty, this website is an ideal, user-friendly source for fighting social isolation, and helps people get more involved in their communities. It is a wonderful resource for learning about isolation and loneliness. This AARP initiative publishes many studies and opens our eyes with evidenced-based suggestions for fighting loneliness.

Visit connect2affect.org to learn more.

Meetups are everywhere and offer a wide assortment of groups, mostly for fun and sharing our interests. There are also groups for meeting people with similar, more serious (and isolating) issues. For example, if you struggle with social anxiety, there are now 1,062 social anxiety meetups around the world. But even if you are not anxious or shy, there is a meetup for everyone. Whether you identify as a foodie, an indie movie aficionada, a dog-lover, a birdwatcher, or just a nice geek, there is a meetup out there for you—or start your own.

Visit meetup.com to learn more.

“Our mission is to nurture human connection by teaching and practicing heart-centered listening in public spaces,” their website boldly states. Started in San Francisco, California, this street initiative is active in most states around the US—in fifty cities and growing also in twelve countries. Volunteers trained to listen empathically sit on sidewalks with chairs in public places so people can conveniently sit down to talk about what is on their minds. This fast-growing project is also a great way to volunteer directly for fighting to end loneliness—right in your own community.

Founder: Tracie Ruble

Visit sidewalk-talk.org to learn more.

This friendly, innovative, and fast-growing network is ideal for finding companionship and building community, and helps older adults team up for sharing their interests such as traveling, taking classes, socializing, dating, or just making new friends.

Visit stitch.net to learn more.

The Transition Network’s Caring Collaborative is a constellation of women providing local assistance and peer support, and establishing lasting bonds. This collaborative provides “neighbor-to-neighbor” genuine caring so that people can receive hands-on assistance during times of surgery, recovery, and other medical procedures. The Caring Collaborative is growing and now has chapters in twelve states.

Visit transitionnetwork.org to learn more.

Joseph Applebaum and Stu Maddux are documentary filmmakers who are particularly concerned with social isolation and loneliness, and now in production with a feature-length film called All the Lonely People. They are an award-winning team who created Gen Silent, a film about the loneliness and isolation of LGBTQ seniors.

Visit thecloudergroup.com to learn more.

The Unlonely Project hosts a film festival featuring themes of loneliness, and many videos can be viewed on their website. Their site also provides excellent reporting on research about isolation and loneliness, and informs us about conferences and symposiums on fighting social isolation nationwide. The latest in news and media about loneliness is here.

Founder: Jeremy Nobel, MD, MPH

Visit artandhealing.org to learn more.

The Village-to-Village Network (V-TV Network) is designed for people over fifty as a way to live in supportive communities that provide social support as we age. This membership-driven, grassroots, nonprofit organization is growing strongly throughout the US, and many area agencies on aging (AAA, www.n4a.org) can help with access to local V-TV networks.

Visit vtvnetwork.org to learn more.

Founder Maryanne Kilkenny, author of “Your Quest for Home,” is a trailblazer in exploring alternative communities and shared housing opportunities for aging women. Her lively and helpful website is full of ideas, resources, and tips for finding house-sharing resources and contacts. Single women especially might find her site uplifting and useful.

Visit womenlivingcommunity.com to learn more.

Tackling the social isolation of veterans, the Wounded Warrior Project organizes veteran peer support groups for thirty-five states and is still growing. Groups offer peer led meetings and events across the country, including Alaska, Hawaii, Puerto Rico, and Guam.

Resource Line for Learning about Support Groups: 888-997-8526 or 888.WWP.ALUM

Visit woundedwarriorproject.org to learn more.

Contact Us

Name(Required)
How can we help?(Required)
Please let us know what's on your mind. Have a question for us? Ask away.
This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.